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consultmybooksGiles dreams again that night.
Buffy doesn't feature as largely in them this time around, although she is still quite prominent. It's almost as though, by speaking with her, he's partially satisfied whatever desires his malfunctioning mind was trying to process last night. Tonight, other horrors play themselves out in his subconscious.
Willow is alive again, but now she's twisted and dark and broken. They fight, and Giles is more powerful than he's ever dreamed of being, but Willow is stronger and she mocks him - "Hurt me? Boy, you just don't get it, do you? Nothing can hurt me anymore. This? Is nothing. It's all...nothing." And his own daughter all but destroys him.
He's being tortured again, but Helios isn't there. He's alone, and the figure standing before him doesn't belong to the Third Party because he has no wings on his back. And he hurts worse than he can ever remembering hurting, but Giles says nothing. At least until Jenny kisses him. Then he says everything, and waits for the world to end until Xander comes to rescue him, sarcastic and sardonic as ever - "Then why would they make you see me?"
Buffy is crying, and he can't console her, but sometimes they're in a library and sometimes they're in a training hall and and sometimes he's poisoned her and sometimes she's begging him not to abandon her. And sometimes they're in the training hall together and they're laughing together like nothing's wrong even though everything is wrong and they both know it. And sometimes she's slamming a door in his face with her last, cold words ringing in his ears - "I think you've taught me enough."
And sometimes he's with a girl he doesn't know, a girl who's tall and dark haired and powerful. And they go everywhere together, to places he's never imagined existing outside of a book and sometimes not even then. And they fight, there's always fighting, and they win no matter how much it hurts them. And he pulls her free from the maw of a monster even as he leaves another man to die.
There's a war, worse than anything they've ever experienced at the hands of the Third Party. Innocent girls die. The sky tears itself open and horrors pour forth to tear the world asunder. Giles is holding the dark haired girl close to him as they do. Buffy isn't there
He wakes up with a gasp that becomes a sob. But a sob is better than a scream. And then Giles just lays there for a second in his own bed in his own room, listening to the sound of his heart racing. He tries to take in the familiar details of the room, tries to put his mind through all the paces Paprika once taught him to make night terrors less terrifying. It's not the first time he's had dreams this vivid and wrong.
But this night and the last have definitely been the worst.
Knowing that he's not going to be getting any more sleep tonight, Giles gets himself dressed as quietly as he can and leaves his room. Courtesy and care for his flatmates means that he's quiet as he can be, distressed as he is. They might still hear him. They might already have heard him. But Giles does his best, ducking out to the kitchen to make tea and closing the front door softly behind him.
The tea doesn't help, doesn't calm, doesn't soothe. The scent of the rising steam just makes him remember his dreams more powerfully, words and captured snapshots rising to his mind even as he tries to forget them, tries to let them fade into nothing like dreams should. His hands start to shake, until finally one wrong move knocks the mug over, spilling tea all over the table.
Giles' journal, sitting nearby, turns itself on in time for anyone still conscious to hear Giles swear at the mess before hurrying to grab enough paper towels to clean it up.]
Damn it!
[Silence for another few seconds, the quiet of the last calm before a storm. When Giles' voice comes over the journal again, he sounds as though he's desperately trying not to break down.]
I'm not insane. I'm not, I can't be...
This is ridiculous. I don't want to save the world. I can't even take care of my own children.
This isn't like Halloween. This isn't the same.
Why is this happening now?
[The relative quiet is broken by the sound of the mug shattering, Giles having just hurled it violently against the nearest wall. The accidental transmission ends there.
He spends the rest of the night working on the boat. It's positioned far enough away from the back of CH7 to hopefully not disturb anyone this late. Exhaustion and anxiety mean that Giles makes a few mistakes in his work, but not many. It isn't the first time he's had to build a boat, after all.
The sun has started to rise before he picks up his journal again, and this time it's to turn on the video function. Anyone who notices the feed will see that Giles appears to have it trained on some sort of...creature, while standing at a respectable distance. The creature is monster, in every sense of the word. The beast is sniffing around at the edge of the treeline, paying him no need at first. Even when it does finally look up at him, it's only to let out a threatening growl. Giles flinches back - the beast returns to whatever is occupying its attention and, in a few minutes, has made its way deeper into the forest.
Giles doesn't follow - his voice over the journal is a mixture of hushed fascination and fear.]
My god...
Buffy doesn't feature as largely in them this time around, although she is still quite prominent. It's almost as though, by speaking with her, he's partially satisfied whatever desires his malfunctioning mind was trying to process last night. Tonight, other horrors play themselves out in his subconscious.
Willow is alive again, but now she's twisted and dark and broken. They fight, and Giles is more powerful than he's ever dreamed of being, but Willow is stronger and she mocks him - "Hurt me? Boy, you just don't get it, do you? Nothing can hurt me anymore. This? Is nothing. It's all...nothing." And his own daughter all but destroys him.
He's being tortured again, but Helios isn't there. He's alone, and the figure standing before him doesn't belong to the Third Party because he has no wings on his back. And he hurts worse than he can ever remembering hurting, but Giles says nothing. At least until Jenny kisses him. Then he says everything, and waits for the world to end until Xander comes to rescue him, sarcastic and sardonic as ever - "Then why would they make you see me?"
Buffy is crying, and he can't console her, but sometimes they're in a library and sometimes they're in a training hall and and sometimes he's poisoned her and sometimes she's begging him not to abandon her. And sometimes they're in the training hall together and they're laughing together like nothing's wrong even though everything is wrong and they both know it. And sometimes she's slamming a door in his face with her last, cold words ringing in his ears - "I think you've taught me enough."
And sometimes he's with a girl he doesn't know, a girl who's tall and dark haired and powerful. And they go everywhere together, to places he's never imagined existing outside of a book and sometimes not even then. And they fight, there's always fighting, and they win no matter how much it hurts them. And he pulls her free from the maw of a monster even as he leaves another man to die.
There's a war, worse than anything they've ever experienced at the hands of the Third Party. Innocent girls die. The sky tears itself open and horrors pour forth to tear the world asunder. Giles is holding the dark haired girl close to him as they do. Buffy isn't there
He wakes up with a gasp that becomes a sob. But a sob is better than a scream. And then Giles just lays there for a second in his own bed in his own room, listening to the sound of his heart racing. He tries to take in the familiar details of the room, tries to put his mind through all the paces Paprika once taught him to make night terrors less terrifying. It's not the first time he's had dreams this vivid and wrong.
But this night and the last have definitely been the worst.
Knowing that he's not going to be getting any more sleep tonight, Giles gets himself dressed as quietly as he can and leaves his room. Courtesy and care for his flatmates means that he's quiet as he can be, distressed as he is. They might still hear him. They might already have heard him. But Giles does his best, ducking out to the kitchen to make tea and closing the front door softly behind him.
The tea doesn't help, doesn't calm, doesn't soothe. The scent of the rising steam just makes him remember his dreams more powerfully, words and captured snapshots rising to his mind even as he tries to forget them, tries to let them fade into nothing like dreams should. His hands start to shake, until finally one wrong move knocks the mug over, spilling tea all over the table.
Giles' journal, sitting nearby, turns itself on in time for anyone still conscious to hear Giles swear at the mess before hurrying to grab enough paper towels to clean it up.]
Damn it!
[Silence for another few seconds, the quiet of the last calm before a storm. When Giles' voice comes over the journal again, he sounds as though he's desperately trying not to break down.]
I'm not insane. I'm not, I can't be...
This is ridiculous. I don't want to save the world. I can't even take care of my own children.
This isn't like Halloween. This isn't the same.
Why is this happening now?
[The relative quiet is broken by the sound of the mug shattering, Giles having just hurled it violently against the nearest wall. The accidental transmission ends there.
He spends the rest of the night working on the boat. It's positioned far enough away from the back of CH7 to hopefully not disturb anyone this late. Exhaustion and anxiety mean that Giles makes a few mistakes in his work, but not many. It isn't the first time he's had to build a boat, after all.
The sun has started to rise before he picks up his journal again, and this time it's to turn on the video function. Anyone who notices the feed will see that Giles appears to have it trained on some sort of...creature, while standing at a respectable distance. The creature is monster, in every sense of the word. The beast is sniffing around at the edge of the treeline, paying him no need at first. Even when it does finally look up at him, it's only to let out a threatening growl. Giles flinches back - the beast returns to whatever is occupying its attention and, in a few minutes, has made its way deeper into the forest.
Giles doesn't follow - his voice over the journal is a mixture of hushed fascination and fear.]
My god...
Tags:
Re: filtered 100%
Date: 2011-04-27 05:51 am (UTC)Yes, I do.
Being useful at all would have been nice.
filtered 100%
Date: 2011-04-27 04:07 pm (UTC)Re: filtered 100%
Date: 2011-05-01 08:25 pm (UTC)filtered 100%
Date: 2011-05-04 07:21 am (UTC)Yeah.
Look there's no need to worry about them for now. It'll blow over soon enough, like it always does.
Re: filtered 100%
Date: 2011-05-04 01:38 pm (UTC)...there might be some cause for concern with Helios, at least. Can you speak with him at a more decent hour?
filtered 100%
Date: 2011-05-07 02:52 am (UTC)With all the excitement I almost let it slip my mind. Is he alright right now?
Re: filtered 100%
Date: 2011-05-07 03:14 pm (UTC)But whatever dreams he's having are...bothering him. Setting him off.
filtered 100%
Date: 2011-05-08 08:20 am (UTC)If it gets too crazy don't hesitate to call me up. I doubt I'll be sleeping a lot anyway.
Re: filtered 100%
Date: 2011-05-08 02:37 pm (UTC)filtered 100%
Date: 2011-05-09 08:07 am (UTC)Re: filtered 100%
Date: 2011-05-09 01:54 pm (UTC)The hardest I'll be working for a while is on the boat. And that's nothing much.
filtered 100%
Date: 2011-05-10 02:37 am (UTC)[She chuckles a little. Just trying to lighten this whole bad mood alright.]
If you need any help with that I'm willing to offer a hand in any way.